WHY DISAPPOINTMENTS ARE OUR RESPONSIBILITY.







Source; Bing


After a week of rather a disappointing series of events, I decided I needed to blow off some steam. So I carried my extremely burdened heart, a notebook and a pen to put my day sadness into words. I went over to a friend's house and just let the stress of the past few days go. After listening to me, my friend came to a strong conclusion; I gave way too many fucks. So what did he do? He sent me Mark Manson's book, 'The Subtle Art of Not Giving A Fuck'.

At first I was confused. Why would he send that? DId I really give too many fucks? So my curiosity got the better of me and I read the book. To say that he was not right would be an understatement. I not only learnt that I gave way too many fucks, but also I had to learn to reserve my fucks for what was truly important. The reason why I felt all these disappointments were simply one; I cared about everything, even that which I had no business caring for. So when things did not go my way, which they didn't, I was devastated and the only was to feel better was to blame and heap responsibility on everything but me.

You see, disappointments come in all shapes and sizes. You did everything right, or at least you think you did. You had faith in yourself, an efficient working strategy, a strong work ethic and iron clad determination. That still somehow was not enough because everything just blew up in your face. Well, guess what? It may not be your fault, but it sure is your responsibility. There is a difference between fault and responsibility. Fault is because of the choices we have made and responsibility is the choices we are about to make. It may not be your fault that you got fired, or your partner dumped you before your birthday, or your colleague took all the credit for your work, but it is your responsibility. 

Mark Manson wrote that 'With great responsibility comes great power'. When we decide to shoulder the luggage that is our life and not make it someone else responsibility, we give ourselves the power to steer our lives in the direction we want them to go. Your partner dumps you before our birthday. It will suck, but you decide whether you are going to let this ruin your day or not. You were fired, it's a pity, but you decide whether you are going to wallow in misery or try to make the most of all the free time you have. It is the truth though that all this is easier said than done, but to live a fulfilling life, you need to make the right decisions, not the easier one.
With Great Responsibility Comes Great Power

There are instances though where it is our fault. It is in human nature to error that is one of the key distinction of human beings. The real issue is someone taking up responsibility for their mistakes. There are people out there who would prefer to blame their actions on someone else."It is all his fault, he made me so angry that I just had to hit him" or "It's not my fault I cheated, I have not felt loved in this relationship for months". There is a certain moral high that people get from avoiding responsibility, but that is only in the short run. In the long run, such people find themselves alone and shunned because, let's face it, who would want to be around a person who is always right no matter how wrong they are.

Taking responsibility for life disappointments doesn't mean that you are in wrong, It just means that you are not giving disappointment power over you. It takes a lot of work, especially when you are feeling down, but as far as we know, nothing ever worth having comes easy. I learnt that. I have learnt to take responsibility for my disappointments so that I get back on my feet faster by choosing to. The power is all in your choice and you can take it; if you want to.

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